We can’t keep acting like quarantine has tanked Mother’s Day. It’s not like anyone really plans that far ahead. That is two months prior to the imposed isolation to contain COVID-19.
I didn’t plan ahead. I was so confident I would have the chance to go home on Mother’s Day weekend and decide on the day itself what we want to do and where we want to go for lunch or dinner.
Then the pandemic happened. I was stuck in Manila while my family’s in Rizal. My mom would call me several times a day with recurring questions, “Kamusta ka d’yan?” a mere formality but also “Kelan ka uuwi?” At first, my answer was a reluctant “I don’t know.” I can’t drive and there are no public transport options. Then it became a firm, “When the lockdown is up.” Even when my grandfather died weeks later, I insisted on staying away out of fear that I may be a carrier, much to the ire of other relatives who made their way from outside cities to mourn his passing.
And now Mother’s Day is two days away and still no going home for me. Not now when both my addresses are under enhanced community quarantine with no clear sight of it ever being lifted or downgraded to general community quarantine.
So what do I plan to do? Well, I was originally planning to cook at home but since that’s all screwed up I guess I’ll settle for video calls or any one of these ideas.
Video call (verb)
This isn’t a bad idea at all. My mom’s snide remarks about my “alleged” weight gain and overgrown hair aside, seeing each other from our side of our screens is the next best thing to in-person meetings.
Sometimes you just have to remind your mom you’re still there. Otherwise, she’ll go on one of her long naps and forget all about you. Nothing really changes, no?
Oh, and be sure to teach her how to do it. As in, how to turn it on, how to take your call, where to look and that they don’t have to speak directly to the mic for you to hear them.
[READ: Hide the mess and noise at home during video meetings with these tools]
Book a delivery
If you’re reading this it’s too late for flowers, custom cakes, or whatever extravagant surprises you have in mind that requires calling and booking in advance. Here’s something last-minute but still dignified: pizza. If you live in a serviceable area, chances are there’s a pizza chain you can order from online and have a box or two (or three, “I love you”) delivered to your mom’s house.
[READ: 16 Metro Manila restaurants still delivering quality pizza]
Check in with their house companion though. Can she eat greasy food? Ask if you remember it correctly that she’s lactose intolerant. Is she the type who wants extra hot sauce? But make that person swear they won’t spoil the surprise.
Bribe your siblings or your dad
If, like me, you have siblings still living under the same roof as your parents, cherish them. They are precious resources you can leverage when emergencies like this arise. Have them run your surprise errands, teenagers are awfully good at surprises given that you pay them well. If they’re not down to do it, there’s always dad.
[READ: Meeting the father I never knew I had through Facebook]
Post online
Your very online mom is very proud of you as evidenced by her many posts of your childhood photos and your overseas trips. Make all her Facebook amigas jealous by posting a touching message on her wall accompanied by a flattering photo of hers (yes, even if it’s from her teenage years). If such a photo is not available, cook something up and take a photo, say it’s for mom. Top it off with the feeling check-in, “feeling lonely.”
Set a later date
Your mom would understand if you put off this celebration for something better when everything is okay. It will also buy you time to think of something grand, to save up for said grand gesture—or if you’re not mindful, to forget it again. Please, don’t. Use your mobile calendar, for god’s sake!
Header art by Nubefy Design for All. Submitted for United Nations Global Call Out To Creatives. Courtesy of United Nations COVID-19 Response on Unsplash
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Sometimes, mothers don’t know best—and that’s okay