I got an in-person event invitation. How do I politely say no?

  • Among the ways to gently refuse invitations from friends and relatives whose feelings you care about is by reminding them of the present health risks
how to decline in-person event invitation sf

The number of people you can spot outdoors can sometimes fool you into thinking that the pandemic is over—or at least, not as fearsome as before. Only Metro Manila, Batangas, Iloilo City, Tacloban City, Lanao del Sur, Iligan and Davao City are still under GCQ until Dec. 31, while the rest of the country is under modified general community quarantine. 

A lot of quarantine restrictions have been eased as well, including travel regulations and allowed operational capacities in different establishments like hotels. In-person workshops, seminars and conferences have also been allowed starting this month. And as Christmas rounds the corner, this relaxed situation is making a lot of people think about finally visiting relatives and friends they have dearly missed.

Photo by Eugene Zhyvchik on Unsplash

But news flash: Mass gatherings are still prohibited in the country. According to Interior Secretary Eduardo Año, this includes the typical family reunions attended by “different families within a clan.” Christmas parties, in general, are not allowed either. 

These should be enough to convince anyone against planning a face-to-face social gathering for the holidays. But in case you’re still receiving invitations from friends and relatives for an in-person event, we prepared some tips to help you let them down easy.

[READ: All my friends and family want to go out. What should I tell them?]

Your mental health is a valid reason

nolisoli decline in-person event invitations

You don’t want to leave the comfort of your home, and that’s valid. Pandemic anxiety can make our minds conjure negative what-ifs and worst-case scenarios, and getting into situations that leave us more vulnerable to the virus may cause us more stress. These situations include in-person events, and it should be easily understandable if you excuse yourself from attending due to the discomfort and anxiety it might cause you. 

Instead of your physical presence, offer your virtual attendance via phone or video call—after all, this mode of socialization has worked for over half a year now.

Be honest and straightforward

nolisoli decline in-person event invitations

Declining an in-person event invite can be as effortless as clicking “not going” on a Facebook notice. We advise you to make use of this, because ignoring it might lead to your friends or relatives personally messaging you instead to follow up on your attendance. That will require you to come up with an excuse to reject their invitation, or worse, make it harder for you to say no.

But if you do get asked, just be honest and tell them that social gatherings still make you uncomfortable at the moment. The pandemic has exhausted us all, and being straightforward saves both you and the person inviting you from unnecessary mental gymnastics.

To soften the blow, do let them know that you want to spend time with them—it’s just that safety is your priority, so maybe not now, but in the future. With more anti-COVID-19 vaccines being developed and tested out,  the best we can do right now is wait while keeping ourselves safe and healthy.

[READ: 90-yo woman and man named William Shakespeare get first Pfizer COVID-19 vaccine shots in UK]

Remind them of the risks

This isn’t just for you, but for other attendees to the event as well. As of Dec. 19, there are still 28,047 active cases in the country, and 1,491 of these are new. Metro Manila is still leading in terms of new cases recorded, followed by Southern and Central Luzon. If the in-person event will be held in these areas or if other attendees are coming from there, your risk of exposure to the virus can be higher. 

Means of transit to the event place is also an important factor to consider. Do you have your own car, or will you have to take public transportation? Some of us are currently shying away from commuting to avoid being exposed to other people. There are also cities and provinces with different quarantine regulations, COVID-19 test requirements, and other restrictions that can make it difficult or burdensome for you to attend. You can bring these matters up with the event host if they ask about your attendance, too.

[READ: How to keep yourself virus-free on commutes]

Chances are, others feel the same way

Many of us share the same fears and worries about the pandemic, and there’s a huge chance that other people invited to the event don’t think it’s a good idea to frolic outside our home and surround ourselves with other people as well. If you’re feeling too shy to say no, wait for others to take the initiative and just follow their lead. Herd immunity might not be real, but a herd mentality of refusing social gatherings to avoid health risks might help lower the number of new cases in the country a bit.

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